The Tribal Way

Bless the Broken Road

Someone from my past recently pointed me towards a song, a country song?, which I could completely relate to.  The song went…

“I set out on a narrow way, many years ago
Hoping I would find true love, along the broken road
But I got lost a time or two
wipe my brow and kept pushing through
I couldn't see how every sign, pointed straight to you”

I’ve never been into country music, and the very thought of being able to relate my life to a country song is scary to say the least, but I couldn’t but help think about signs in our lives that keep us on our path.

In one of my recent posts, I had written about Personal Legends.  And the fact that if I want something in life, the entire universe conspires in helping me achieve it.  I believe now that the universe often relays messages to us through signs.  I used to be so busy that I wasn’t able to stop and consider what may or may not be a sign.  I’ve realized since that it is necessary to pay attention to the little details in life, and open my heart and mind to the universe and invite the guidance into my life.

Along the journey of life so far, I’ve come across several people, who have played a role in shaping my life to where it is today.  As the song suggests, they’ve been like northern stars, pointing me towards my path.  As I think of all these people in my life that I’ve had a personal, professional, or tangential relationship with, i realize that each and every one of them has helped me become who I am, get to where I am, and for that I’m forever grateful.

Some of these relationships resulted in many happy times, while some caused a lot of pain.  In some, I grew a lot, in others I caused a lot of pain.  Looking back at each of these relationships, thinking of the fond and painful memories, there isn’t one that I can’t attribute some part of my successes and my learning to. 

Each experience in a personal relationship has revealed more about my own self.  Things I liked in others were things I aspired for, things I disliked were a reflection of my own shortcomings.  Each professional relationship has helped me mature as an individual, not only acquiring skills that I leverage today, but recognizing the challenges I face in certain areas of my life.

I can honestly say that were it not for the people in my life, past and present, I wouldn’t be as happy today, nor would my life be so full. 

The person who was the catalyst behind me leaving grad school to pursue a career in software, and the person I met at that company, who had faith in me to trust me with huge responsibilities at a later date setting in motion the upswings, believing in me when I probably wouldn’t.  The failure I experienced at one startup, teaching me more about corporate finance than I would’ve learnt.  Each one of these situations has truly been a guiding star, leading to today, where I am living my dream.

In my personal life, there have been individuals who have loved me unconditionally, a few that broke my trust when I was a young adult, some that were with me during my most amazing life experiences, some that I held resentments towards, and some that I was hurtful to.  If I truly look back, each of these experiences were directly responsible in shaping my “Identity” today. 

I’ve since forgiven the people who broke my trust, and am willing to ask for forgiveness where I was at fault.  Because, as the song goes,

“Every long lost dream led me to where you are
Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars
Pointing me on my way, into your loving arms
This much I know is true
That God blessed the broken road
That led me straight to you”

Had it not been for these individuals along the broken road, I would not get to where I am today.  Today, I know how to be a friend among friends, a worker among workers,  and simply a member of a family.  I’m learning how to live a tribal life, and for that I am grateful to a lot of people.  They’re in part responsible for the peace, serenity, and happiness that I experience – today!

What’s my Personal Legend?

I just finished reading a great book about our dreams in life.  A part that stuck out for me was the concept of a “Personal Legend” – which, according to the author, is what we've always wanted to accomplish in life.

As most things do, the idea of a personal legend got me thinking.  When I was younger, I think I knew what my personal legend was.  As I’ve grown, I’m sure I’ve gone through times when I’d answer that question very differently.  I’ve always had dreams… but to me, part of maturity was realizing that dreams were just that, and what I thought was a personal legend was unattainable and impossible.

Now, if I was to answer the question today, could I?  What is my Personal Legend?

The easiest to answer is the question as it relates to my professional life.  Two months into techTRIBE, I would like nothing more than to achieve the goals we set out for.  They are definitely achievable.

Outside of the professional life, I’d like accomplishments related to family, friends, possessions, experiences, learning, and passions.   I am sure I’ve missed a few areas, but you get the idea.  I’ve always thought that I should have a family that shows me the way of life, and where I can find unconditional love.  I’ve always wanted friends who I could count on for support and silliness.  Possessions is a little more interesting since I’ve wanted so much in life.  I could go on for a bit.

A funny thing happened as I was writing this.  Being a little bit of a perfectionist, I jotted down on a sheet of paper, examples of what I’d want in my list of personal legends.  As I wrote them down, I realized something, which opened my eyes a little.

I HAVE a family that has been a guiding light.  They’ve done the very best they could to guide me through life, while allowing me to develop my own identity.

I HAVE friends who are fun, caring, annoying, and sassy – all within an hour at times.  These are people who are there with me, along the roads of everyday life.

I HAVE no such desire for new possessions, and am mostly content with what I have.  A friend asked me what I wanted recently, and I didn’t have a clue of anything that I needed.

I HAVE had wonderful, life changing experiences.  And they will always be there with me, with more to come.  Each experience has had their moments of joy, pain, ecstasy and tears, but each has been unique and forever memorable.

I’ve learnt a few things in life.  Some though teachings, some though other people’s experiences, and some through my own.    There’s a student in me that is forever in thirst for new learning, and at times, the results may not be good but I always learn.

I HAVE been able to live out many passions in life.  Be it a passion for certain people, travels, or life changing experiences, I’ve been fortunate.  I just had an opportunity to begin work on one of my passions to work with underprivileged kids.  A friend allowed me to volunteer at a career fair of sorts in the peninsula, which allowed me to work a little with 15-16 year olds.  It’s a dream I’ve had for a while – investing in “Intellectual Capital” for a living.

You get the idea.  It sure looks like I’m living my personal legend.  Or is it various personal legends?  Either way, if I step back a little, it sure looks like life TODAY is either presenting me with the life as I wanted in a legend, or the opportunity to take a step towards it.  One thing is clear to me… I HAVE BEEN LIVING MY PERSONAL LEGEND SO FAR IN MY LIFE, and there’s never a reason nor a desire to ever change anything in the past.

As for the future, I know that if I want something as a personal legend, the entire universe conspires in helping me achieve it.  I do have to work for it, and also be open to receiving help from the universe.